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Animated Dancing Stripper? Check...

by Andrew - April 22, 2002

If there ever was a game that combined sex, drugs, aliens, pop culture references and rock and roll, Duke Nukem 3D was it. Released in 1996 it spawned and won over millions of fans from all over the world. And some of these fans made websites. Today we'll take a look at the hard work and determination that goes into a D3D Fan Site and step by step instructions to create your own!

Basic Layout
Forget about tables. Forget style. Forget everything. For in the realm of Duke Nukem 3D fan sites there is no room for the afore mentioned traits/things. In this realm, you MUST resort to crappy java apps and background midis or you will be shot!

If you want a true Duke Nukem 3D fansite you'll want to set up your free account filled with banner/pop-up ads at fortunecity, geocities, or angelfire. The more pop-up ads the better!

After the visitor has closed about 40 pop-up windows they'll be very eager to read the title of your site. THIS IS WHY YOU MUST PUT THE TITLE IN BIG RED FONT with DANCING STRIPPERS and/or FLAMES ON BOTH SIDS! The title, as flexible it is, must include the words "Duke Nukem 3D", your name, and the words "Awesome" or "Best" or "Boobtacular". I mean, that's just class.

Best Site Ever Line
Now that the visitor knows the name of your site, they'll need to know if it's any good or not. This is the reason for what I like to call the "Best Site Ever!" line. This, like the title, is really up to you after you follow a few simple instructions:

  • Let the visitor know that your site is infact the best Duke Nukem 3D site ever created
  • Let the visitor know that your site is the source for everything ever related to Duke Nukem 3D

After those simple instructions you'll have them hooked!

This is now a good time to add a random screenshot. This'll show the visitor that you have actually played the game to some extent and maybe have made your own levels. You can add the title of your site into the screen shot just incase the visitor has forgotten it already.

Now it's time for the content of your site. The meat. Here you want to put everything you have sitting on your hard drive onto this one page. People don't like sifting through organized, well designed pages. No, they want to have all the information right in there face, although you may want to organize your junk into sections on the main page. Insert random java applications where applicable. Some sections you'll need are "Downloads", "Maps", "Links", "Contact", and maybe you have some "Duke RTS Files" on your computer. Each link should be accompanied by a graphic from the game... like... say... the button graphic.

You'll need one of these to show the visitor that they are indeed one of the first people to visit your hot new site.

You'll need to join a webring because webrings are cool. Your site would severly lack in coolness if you lack a webring.

Some More Pointers
Always refer to yourself as "us" because websites made by more than one person are much more awesome.
A broken picture here or there doesn't hurt either. It give you that "I'm too cool to do anything about it" feel that everyone loves.
Don't use l337 sp34k. This isn't Counter Strike.

Here's my sample page to help you along.

And that's how you do that.


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